'Betrayal' is a good word
Re: Just Checking in -- MaryM Top of thread Forum
Posted by:
Mike Finch ®

12/20/2004, 04:31:35
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Hello Mary

Good to hear from you, and to read your journal entry - both sad and inspiring at the same time.

I too feel that 'betrayal' is one of the best words to sum up how I feel about my time with Maharaji.

I trusted him completely when I surrendered my life to him, as best as I could (although he was always reviling us for not surrendering enough). It was indeed a cruel betrayal.

Of course, we can be laughed at for our innocence and naivety at believing in him and his message in the first place. But that does not lessen the hurt - it adds to it even, since we now pile 'I was so stupid' onto the grieving and the pain of having poured our living love into such a dead vessel.

Now all that is behind me, I want to learn from it. Losing the naivety is a good thing, but I want to keep the softness alive, and remain open to possibilities without being at the mercy of the next con that comes along. It is a delicate balancing act.

Certainly that questioning in me that took me to Maharaji is still with me; I just need to drop the stupidity and naivety from it, and keep the cynicism and hardness a little to one side (they are still good allies that I need to call on at times).

Take care

-- Mike







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