One problem I have personally have, and this I suppose is a diametrically opposed view to the typical premie view expressed on this forum, is how should I understand such past "beautiful experiences", now that I know they were largely based on falsehood. For me, it isn't good enough to just have had or to continue to have a nice "experience" without there being some deeper moral or at least real basis behind it.I don't know if this makes sense, so I will give an example. I have taken the drug Ecstasy on occasion. A typical experience, for example in a club, is that you find yourself feeling a strong intimacy and openness with other otherwise superficial acquaintances. Club friends you might call them. While you are under the influence they are your best friends. But what happens is that the next day when the drug wears off, you don't want to have anything to do with these people. That feeling is completely gone. This bizarre polarized feeling is so strong that when you bump into people on the street you try to avoid them.
A similar thing happened to me when I started to drift away from Rawat. I found these tight bonds I had with people were in many cases not very real. Even the experience of meditation wasn't the same anymore. Meditation still worked, but it just didn't have the same signifcance for me anymore. It became irrelevant.
So for me the so-called "beautiful" experiences lose their beauty when they aren't based on something more meaningful, as if they are just a mirage. (oh! that's why people call Rawat miragey! I guess I'm a slow learner.)
Well that is just my perspective. I know others here seem to feel the meditation as a separate phenomena away from Rawat is just as "beautiful".
And of course I'm not saying that real friendships aren't possible between premies or even clubbers for that matter. But at least for me, a basis for that friendship has to be found beyond the illusion that brought those people together in the first place.
