Andries,

There's an expression I found in a very good book about cult recovery, written by Janja Lalich and Madelaine Tobias, titled Captive Hearts, Captive Minds.  When discussing their various "leaders" in group discussions, former members discovered that their leaders had so many similar traits.  These former cult members came up with the term  "Cookie Cutter Messiah School," to describe the typical cult leader behavior. That fits quite well, IMO.  The book is also good for people who have a difficult time being in intimate relationships and helps to identify partners/spouses who are boundless and abusive.

Of course, there have been positive aspects too, like friendship, beautiful experiences, community that provides a safe environment for further growth.

I tend to feel/think the same way Dant does, although I do understand why some former cult members need to look at the so-called positive aspects of their involvement and hold them up as something to value.  It's simply not the case for me personally.

I have a hard time calling cult involvement a "beautiful experience" when it was all based upon huge lies that were perpetrated by the leader.  Don't forget, without a leader, there can't be followers.