The reason I initially wrote about positive things was because I wanted and still want to salvage something good from the whole SSB experience, which I find not easy.

I feel the same about my time with Maharaji. It depends what you mean by 'something good' though.

Can I salvage anything 'good' from my time with M? Well, I have learnt a lot (I suppose that is good), and I did have good times (can't deny that). But the bad times far outweighed the good, so that is not good. Would I do the same if I could have my time again ? Definitely not.

The really 'good' thing is that you and I both have come to realise that we were in cults, and have left healthy and relatively sane - now that is good.

I find it important not to become bitter or unrealistically cynical and suspicious because of this experience.

'Bitter' - perhaps not (although there is a place for righteous anger and grief).

'Unrealistically cynical' - no, but I want to keep realistically cynical.

'Suspicious' - why not ? That bullshit meter that gives me warning whenever there is pretentiousness in the air, or assumed authority, or just plain unsupported wishful thinking, has served me well since I left the cult; and it was being with Maharaji that created this wonderful and sensitive bullshit meter! That's good too.

Take care