thanks for that. i just drifted away from it all years ago, interestingly it's only in the last few years I've got angry or had any particualar emotions about it i could identify (apart from no it was good for me blah blah) i guess it's finding this website and having old suspicions, experiences, observations and the whole shabang unfolded again. Also realising how he's still at it and especially to recently find the Lying Pig Man on community television!!

Also i read a message here yonks ago that touched a nerve and stayed with me. It was about how the suckers were all really and genuinely good people with love and pure intention, compassion etc etc It rang so true, it makes it all worse somehow. We weren.t idiots (though I sometimes feel that I was) and yes all the people I met were incredible in mind and spirit. LPM twisted it all around and got in the middle somehow.

And then again i sometimes feel quite humbled. I didn't lose lots of money, I didn't lose my life, just a bit of sanity and dignity, and I can really understand now that all sorts of people can get into cults, i have compassion round that I guess. It really has helped me to understand and recognise ideology and its insipid nature...Something too about misplaced love, and maybe we do need devotion: but to what?

As for talking to people one on one, i don't know anyone who is still involved (or alive!!) Maybe a friend i haven't seen for ages but...

hey this is quite therapeutic!! i'll pop in again.