I was given numbers of chances to do better but it's not that easy for me - I remember going down to Sydney and visiting old friends and I had been primed to be careful and I avoided all difficult topics but still there was this strained discomfort and thinking about it now it is akin to going and having dinner with your ex's family after you've just declared him a fraud. It didn't matter that I wasn't repeating it, I was not revoking, I had not returned to the fold.The premie community is the people who believe in 'Maharaji'. In a sense it's like you're telling an innocent child their teddy bear is stuffed with lies just by existing.
From my perspective, as still a real person it was what kind of a friend are you being telling me to be silent when I so need to speak.
Every so often I bump into an old friend and the fondness is there just as ever but I am not, it's not supposed to be like that - I was given a nickname by a friend - the Evil Princess of Darkness, Epod for short.
It's interesting, my ex stopped believing in Maharaji without causing a ripple, in himself or others, but I, it went round the premie circles, that I had fallen from grace.
Jai sat chit Anand, my fellow epods.
