I don't recall being moved as much by a post since Lp's (2009?) post comparing an aspen tree stand (the world's largest single living organism) to humanity and Prem Rawat/Knowledge to a fungus killing the subterranean root system - an analogy to all the senseless sacrifices made by premies and the mental, emotional and material harm done to them.

Your post was moving because you described the essence of my vulnerabilities. I haven't changed. They're still there. It's just that I'm much better at keeping a lid on them. It also reminded me of when I was so desperate for Maharaji's validation and approval that I physically, mentally and emotionally self-generated my way into the darshan recovery area. I needed to be there. I'd invested so much and tried so hard to be a good devotee. Yet I was still suffering and only Maharaji's look of approval could help ease my pain. I needed that look so much that whatever look I got, I interpreted it as the one I needed and down I went. (I did manage to make my way to the floor mats! I mean, I'm not stupid! )

Lastly, it's deplorable when a con artist exploits their prey's deeply personal vulnerabilities and uses them against them. Thank you for saying that as well.

It takes a lot of deconstruction and humility, i.e., soul searching, to arrive at everything you just said.