Eileen,

Your smug off-the-new-age-rack abuse of "responsibility" is ridiculous.  By saying the responsibility was yours to become a premie you absolve Rawat of his responsibility in luring us into and then keeping us trapped in his cult.  By your "reasoning", no fraud artists bear any responsibility for ripping of their marks because their victims chose to give them their money.  That's not how the world sees it, that's not how the law sees it and that's not how anyone with any proper ethical sense sees it either.  It is how new age fools see it often enough though, the better to allow them to keep falling for each other's scams again and again and again.