"...what hope ex-premies can give people... The answer is, IMO, that we do not offer them anything except the possibility of not looking for hope in other people

Sorry John, that doesn't offer much of a beacon. Just words I'm afraid. Kinda like something Lenin would have offered to the proletariat masses.

... but instead relying on ourselves to make the life we want, and invest our hopes in our own abilities to make the future we want for ourselves and those we love. "

The future you will have for yourself is old-age and death, war and disease, global warming and economic upheaval, and the odd tsunami. And if you're lucky those you love won't disappoint you too much. You don't have much control over all that.

One other thing. To think premies -- say like myself -- do not have this same sense of self-reliance is rather naive. You no doubt think this because it helps rationalise what makes you so much better now than when you were a premie. You flatter yourself thinking you're further ahead on these things than premies just beause you're not one any more.