And that is to be free from Maharaji.

I think it was Lexy below who mentioned how freeing it is not to have to go to those programs any more.

My last program was at Long Beach in 1997 and even though I fell into a deep hypnotic trance during Maharaji's last satsang, I realized that I didn't belong anymore.  It all felt so wound up and so Pavlovian.  Worse it was very choreographed and strained to the point where to me it felt like even Maharaji was going through the motions.

And I saw that to be in Premland one had to "act" in a way that was exceptable and appropriate to all the other premies who seemed to require so much peer group support.  Not to have that "blissful" and "quiet" and "knowing" look seemed disturbing to premies.  Individual expression or even the slightest frown was seen as someone in their mind.  And, of course, I no longer tried to dress or look like a premie so I felt out of place.

Hey, not that I won't miss people that I've met through the years, but I won't miss feeling forced and peer pressured.  And those damn school marm handbells that the World Peace Usher Team used to herd us into our seats so that the "Speaker" wouldn't be annoyed!  Ick!  Please distribute the Soma!

Never again and with pleasure and great relief I say that.