Well thanks for replying, Lexy and please ask away if there's anything you want to ask me.  I think the only people who can possibly understand the pain you're talking about is those who have been through it themselves.  It takes a special set of most unusual circumstances to feel it and there's not many people who've been through all that.

How many people lived through their twenties believing that the Lord had come and that they were his blessed devotees?  Even more, how many have nurtured a dream throughout their lives, a dream that in the end vanished like the morning mist to leave one shipwrecked upon the shore?

I'm playing one of my favourite songs at the moment which my daughters have got me into.  I must say, I wasn't too impressed with "Girls Aloud" at first (except for their looks!) even though my eldest daughter is their biggest fan but I was pleasantly surprised and captivated by their number one hit song that they made for the "Children In Need" charity.  The song is of course, "I'll Stand By You".

And that's just what we'll do here, Lexy and there's some good people here.  We'll stand by you and by each other because we've been through the same thing and are still going through it.  To give you some idea of how I felt that night when I finally realised the truth about Maharaji, here's what I wrote:

It is not a joy coming to the conclusion that Maharaji, The King of Kings, Lord of Hosts, Lord of the Universe, The Almighty God in human form, The Lord of Love, Protector of the Weary and the Weak, The Saviour of Mankind, The Second Coming, My Mother, Father, Brother and Friend, my All to me;

It is not a joy coming to the conclusion that Maharaji is NOT all of the above.

And life goes on and yet it's a different chapter and a new beginning.  We'll stand by each other and help each other and I think a greater understanding will develope for us.  The idealism that first brought us together is still there and even thirty years of Maharajism can't kill it.

Very good to talk to you Lexy, after all these years.  I send you a whole lotta love.