"the cult was a microcosm of the world at large, no different but particularly smelly due to the close confines"
The cult as a microcosm crossed my mind when I replied to Susan. As she described them, there were certainly premies with predatory or awful personality traits before they became involved with Prem Rawat. So for a moment, I gave him the benefit of the doubt because he had no control over who approached him for Knowledge. That's what the cult would surely say in his defense. Then it struck me that he had complete control over the people he allowed to be around him (his inner circle) as well as mahatmas and those who became initiators and instructors. He had every opportunity to lead by example and set standards for them. Instead, he set horrible standards of behavior that he knew had to be kept hidden from premies and the public at large.
The fact that many premies willingly took vows of secrecy (x-rated) and signed non-disclosure agreements intended to prevent what they witnessed from being exposed to premies and the public tells me everything I need to know about their charachter, or at least the detrimental effect Prem Rawat had on their charachter.
Apparently, Prem Rawat was aware that Jagdeo had molested at least several young women and he may have known or had reason to suspect much more. Yet he allowed Jagdeo to continue touring and he surely played a role in shuffling him back to India where he was out of reach from justice. Then there's the usual litany of his hypocritical behavior... the procured women, heavy alcohol consumption, chain smoking, insatiable and demanding materialism and all the rest... the point being that it was entirely at odds with his claim of "such a peace as will never die." If that's the "self" he discovered with his so-called "self-Knowledge," then who needs it.
The "break them down and rehabilitate them as utterly dependent on Maharaji... useless without him" template for the "couldn't buy it for a million bucks" Team Trainings came directly from Prem Rawat. He knew full well who and what he was inflicting on vulnerable premies for the purpose of regaining and reinforcing control over them.
And if there weren't enough toxic people who flocked to him and rose through the ranks in the first place, then he simply made as many as he needed. "Molded them in his image" comes to mind. There were plenty of premies willing to sacrifice their values to do his bidding and he knowingly took full advantage of it.
That corruption of values smell wafted down all the way to me and turned me into a mindless pawn in his chain of exploitation... eager to follow orders. I had no genuine respect for anyone or anything not related to Prem Rawat or his Knowledge and he did absolutely nothing to instill any. To the contrary, he disparaged e v e r y t h i n g. Looking back, I don't recognize that person. It's as if cult indoctrination put me in a crazed and myopic dream state.
What a relief to suddenly snap out of it and see how distorted it all was!
