POV, I think you should apologise to Susan
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Posted by: godonlyknows ® 10/18/2004, 12:42:52 Author Profile Edit Alert Moderators

POV, I don't know you, I have only read a few of your posts (so far), enough though to see that there are perhaps many things you and I would agree about - in regard to Maharaji - and also, no doubt, many things we would disagree about. But you are certainly wrong about one thing. Susan wrote to me: "I wonder what you think about the POV guy who is attacking me because I didn't go to the police? Can you imagine what would have had to happen in my mind to report it to the police?...Is it reasonable to think the 15 year old me would go to the police instead of trying to tell M?" And she says that in a thread (which I cannot find) you wrote: "Either way, every person who knew about this and didn't go to the police cannot point the finger at anyone else". POV, you are definitely wrong to suggest that. It is adding insult to injury. Susan was 15 years old, not yet an adult, in many ways still a child, when she suffered this abuse. Her abuser was very much in a position of power and influence over her. She is in no way to blame for what happened, and in no way to blame for the fact that the police were not informed about it. To suggest that she was in any way to blame is insensitive and simply wrong, and I hope you will apologise to her for what you have suggested. Abusers are highly manipulative and they use their positions of power over their victims not only to inflict their abuse, but also to instil fear. You do not understand what abuse does to a person who suffers it. It causes fear, not a desire to be open about it; it causes confusion, not clear-thinking; it causes distress, something that you want to bury, not something that you want to be brought out into the light for all the world to know about. I am not sure exactly how many years ago this happened to Susan, but, as you are bound to know, there was much less awareness of abuse then, than there is these days, so how could Susan - in those days, at the age of 15 - be expected to know what, with hindsight, might now be regarded as the correct thing to do? The abuser blames the victim - I don't think anyone else should blame the victim in any way.

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Thank you for saying that... --- Cynthia ( Mon, Oct 18, 2004, 14:30:46 ) ( 455 bytes ) +1 Thanks from me too, gok --- Marianne ( Mon, Oct 18, 2004, 16:22:54 ) ( 405 bytes ) Re: POV = GOK --- Enquirer ( Mon, Oct 18, 2004, 15:24:24 ) ( 242 bytes ) +4 JFK=BLT --- dant ( Mon, Oct 18, 2004, 15:51:24 ) ( 651 bytes ) +1 i witness, dant is a smart guy in flesh and bones (no text) --- toby ( Mon, Oct 18, 2004, 16:17:03 ) ( 0 bytes ) +1 thanks, you aint too shabby yourself toby! --- dant ( Mon, Oct 18, 2004, 17:07:32 ) ( 74 bytes ) POV IS NOT GOK ! --- Lexy ( Mon, Oct 18, 2004, 16:12:12 ) ( 806 bytes ) +1 Re: POV IS NOT GOK ! --- Enquirer ( Mon, Oct 18, 2004, 22:30:49 ) ( 300 bytes ) +2 ...BUT I WOZ GOK ! --- Lexy ( Tue, Oct 19, 2004, 06:13:56 ) ( 1148 bytes ) +2 no, I'm GOK! --- dant ( Tue, Oct 19, 2004, 06:25:12 ) ( 16 bytes ) More of an egotist than a masochist I'd say --- hamzen ( Tue, Oct 19, 2004, 14:15:38 ) ( 327 bytes ) No biggie, Enquirer --- gerry ( Tue, Oct 19, 2004, 10:45:12 ) ( 180 bytes ) Re: POV = GOK --- G. ( Tue, Oct 19, 2004, 09:30:12 ) ( 267 bytes ) +1 Re: who know? --- godonlyknows ( Tue, Oct 19, 2004, 19:25:48 ) ( 109 bytes ) +1 Sorry GOK --- G. ( Tue, Oct 19, 2004, 19:43:59 ) ( 145 bytes ) +2 Sorry all --- G. ( Tue, Oct 19, 2004, 19:50:16 ) ( 130 bytes ) Re: hey... you are not POV are you? --- godonlyknows ( Tue, Oct 19, 2004, 20:06:24 ) ( 616 bytes ) +1 Re: hey... you are not POV are you? --- Lexy ( Wed, Oct 20, 2004, 03:53:56 ) ( 128 bytes ) Re: POV = GOK --- godonlyknows ( Tue, Oct 19, 2004, 19:54:16 ) ( 222 bytes ) Certainly --- POV ( Mon, Oct 18, 2004, 16:25:26 ) ( 683 bytes ) +3 Don't push it POV --- Euro Mod ( Mon, Oct 18, 2004, 16:54:43 ) ( 182 bytes ) He knows about little birdies and leaves that fall... --- San ( Mon, Oct 18, 2004, 20:22:13 ) ( 436 bytes ) I think ~ POV means the "Perverter Of Victims" --- Hilltop ( Mon, Oct 18, 2004, 22:28:31 ) ( 703 bytes ) +2 Prem Rawat's talk called...."The True Mirror" Page 12 --- Hilltop ( Mon, Oct 18, 2004, 23:32:00 ) ( 724 bytes ) file img +1 Prem Rawat's talk ..."The True Mirror" Page 13 --- Hilltop ( Mon, Oct 18, 2004, 23:43:51 ) ( 93 bytes ) file img +1 Prem Rawat's talk ..."The True Mirror" Page 14 --- Hilltop ( Mon, Oct 18, 2004, 23:56:45 ) ( 77 bytes ) file img +1 Prem Rawat's talk ... "War...Why Are You Fighting"? --- Hilltop ( Tue, Oct 19, 2004, 00:33:43 ) ( 225 bytes ) file img Hilltop, .. about sinking ships...(slightly OT) --- Lexy ( Tue, Oct 19, 2004, 06:33:23 ) ( 392 bytes ) +1 Re: Hilltop, .. about sinking ships...(slightly OT) --- Hilltop ( Thu, Oct 21, 2004, 00:45:56 ) ( 97 bytes ) +1 Shape Up or Ship Out!... --- Cynthia ( Fri, Oct 22, 2004, 14:09:41 ) ( 913 bytes ) +1 And then there's the 'Just Walk!' diatribe (nt) (no text) --- San ( Fri, Oct 22, 2004, 17:38:59 ) ( 0 bytes )