Hi Scot,
You will never be alone in those feelings here.
Welcome to the forum.
I look forward to reading your story. One day I will write mine as well.
We have all sustained so much damage. Worse though, are the people that have the opportunity to make an informed decision, but refuse. You and me, we have the chance to heal and progress. The prison gates are now open for us and we have chosen to walk out. The prison gates are open to all, but not everyone wants to leave. Count that as a blessing. I think there will be more to come.