Eileen, you are annoying to no end, aren't you?

Now, I don't know for sure, but I'll bet that Jim Jones, Marshall Applewhite of Heaven's Gate, David Koresh, Shoko Asahara of the saran gas Aum Shinri Kyo cult and all the other kook jobs cult leaders think or thought they'll the real McCoy, too.

So, what's your point about it not being a con job?

And this, Eileen, is the real capper where you're able to know what I felt, huh?

'And you did have plenty of good times and you know it!'

If I had any good times they were related to my premie friends.  If you had 'really' read my post you would have figured out that I always felt a sense of confusion and uncertainty when seeing Maharaji.  That's not to say I was an 'unlit match'.  No, I did have that 'experience'.  But as I said I believe very thoroughly that the experience I had was the experience I needed at the time and the experience was a group high in a fabricated venue where we all expected that kind of experience.  The fabricated venue was all the devotional songs, the endless hours of brainwashing satsang where we were told over and over again about Maharaji's divinity, and Maharaji himeself with his satsang, his crowns, and Krishna suits, and arti and all the rest.

But for me the experience as deep and as powerful as it might have been felt shaky and incomplete because (1) I knew that the experience I was having would fade away in a very short time and actually leave me with a hangover where I would feel spaced out and disconnected to reality and (2) because the experience was not that fulfilling for me.

So, Eileen, please don't tell me what I felt or didn't feel.  You don't have a clue.  And anyone who comes to this forum and acts like you deserves to be picked apart.