Jonx try answering a question with asking one :

 >but when the heart laments its emptiness<  This is pure Rawatism, to any normal person it is meaningless - explain just what it is you mean by:

    1. heart

    2. heart laments

    3. [hearts] emptiness 

>reminded countless times of the beauty within<  again without some context this is meaningless, explain just what it is you mean by:

   1.within

   2. the beauty [within]

>then I have to ask what you consider to be “somewhere”! (Or do you have no idea what I’m talking about?)<  Oh right - you've had that special experience that can't be explained - only the true devotee, one who has truely thirsted can know what you are talking about.  Sorry that doesn't wash here - all human experience is amenable to a substantial degree of explanation - those who say it isn't are liars or charalatans or both. Which are you ?

Or has the role of “victim” become a refuge from the self-criticism stirred up by such questions? Guess that’s why you have no choice but to degrade anything positive he ever did for you, to the point of demonizing him. The greater the deceit, the more comfortable the role of "victim".

OK you opened the door - what is this huge problem you have with MF ? - sounds like he must have rejected you or something. Tell us Jonx, is your investment in Rawat more than just your time and donations - you wouldn't happen to be on the payrole would you ? And your anxiety about  Mike Finch an expression of old unaddressed premie jealousy ?