Joe,

That Powerman post depicts so well how Maharaji has used double-binds and outright contradictions to mentally torment premies. 

One commandment was quite clear:  "Constantly meditate and remember the Holy Name."

In the 1979 Holi satsang below Rawat says that Guru Maharaj Ji, that he, Prem Rawat, is the Holy Name, or a person's breath!  The Holy Name technique is the same technique taught today as part of the Knowledge meditation package offered by Prem Rawat.  I don't see how current students can deny that.  It's no longer called "Holy Name," (or "Word") but it's now referred to as a number. That makes no difference, because it's the very same meditation technique -- then and now.

So, it's quite clear to me, looking back in retrospect, that what Prem Rawat was telling premies in the 1970s and even beyond that, was that they should be meditating, focusing on, and surrendering to him, Prem Rawat, personally, when told us that we must "constantly meditate and remember the Holy Name.  I just don't see how it can be interpreted any other way and furthermore, I remember premies saying just that:  I must remember Maharaji.  Maharaji is inside of me, etc.  Hell, we gave satsang about that all of the time!

But, he took it a step further by commanding (not asking or requesting, but commanding!), "Don't put off until tomorrow what you can do today."  This put even more pressure on premies to focus upon our breath (today and not tomorrow)and to think, while we were at it, that our breath came from him, and existed only because of Rawat, and his mercy, grace, etc.

Also, the "fact" that one could meditate on one's breath 24/7 was promoted in introductory programs as the only true way someone could find true peace.  So it was definitely plugged early on.  I remember that well, as a new person, aspirant and later as a practicing premie.

Yeah, I also remember well how much I buried the feeling of being a nervous wreck.  Nothing was ever good enough or done well enough for Prem Rawat and he never minced words ridiculing premies about it, either.

Interesting.