Ah, you're ok, Doc.  Thank you for attempting to have this discussion with me.

Yes, I gave it a real try and I think that I understood.  And yes, things have changed greatly from the olden days and for that Maharaji should get credit.

And I loved listening to Maharaji speak.  Don't forget I left only in 1997 or so.  I loved programs and loved just focusing on the words of the Master and feeling them.  And I was also very much aware and appreciate of his effort to become less mysterious and more "human" and, in fact, just like us.  I was there.  I experienced that whole period.

But, really, while I was having a deep experience listening to his words whenever I stopped later after the performance and applied any kind of discriminating analysis I had to stop because Maharaji's message is foolish.  Sure, he says that it is all within and so forth, but he also says that without him it doesn’t work.  And then when you really start getting to know and understand the “man” he’s rather pitiful because he’s flawed.  IMO, as a human being he’s incredibly flawed.  I know people who have been up close and at the and in the rez.  You talk to them and they start rolling their eyes and giving you the real wink-wink.  Ok?  I’ve got an insider’s perspective and it confirms what I was feeling as the years went by. Furthermore, as more and X-Rated inner circle people have exited they all seem to have had the same or similar experience with the real Maharaji.  And it doesn’t seem to be very complimentary or flattering.

And have you read the transcripts from those trainings?  Don’t they just say it all?  I can probably very accurately say that Maharaji will “never ever” have trainings again.  Certainly, they were disastrous for him and the people who attended.  For me after reading the training transcripts all the chrome and glitter just washed down the drain to reveal a rusty heap.

http://www.ex-premie.org/pages/trainings_19990725.htm

http://www.ex-premie.org/pages/trainings_19990629.htm

http://www.ex-premie.org/pages/trainings_19990630.htm

http://www.ex-premie.org/pages/trainings_19990701.htm

http://www.ex-premie.org/pages/trainings_19990702.htm

http://www.ex-premie.org/pages/trainings_19990723.htm

http://www.ex-premie.org/pages/trainings_19990724.htm

The man is not a nice man.  Oh, yeah, he donated about $15,000 of rice for Africa.  He leased a facility in India where Eye Doctors Without Borders did some real humanitarian relief work without compensation.  How much did it cost for Maharaji to arrange for them to use that facility?  Or was it a facility that already belonged to the India Elan Vital or whatever it’s called there?

Where’s the real care and giving?

From Maharaji it simply doesn’t exist.

From the beginning he’s been nothing but a spoiled brat who only thinks of himself.  Spray off the chrome with sugar water and remove him from his Lord of the Universe pedestal and he’s nothing more than a very demanding control freak.

Yes, we are all humans including Maharaji now.  But, to me after reading these trainings and I believe I saw a video of one Maharaji is simply a very self-conscious insecure man with a huge inability to really connect with people other than the times he is on his pedestal, which really really really is Lord of the Universe to all of those in the know.

Also, when you read the Elan Vital propaganda that states Maharaji spoke at the United Nations when he, in fact, merely spoke at a rented United Nations facility, how can you justify that as being honest and truthful?  There's that TRUTH word again.  I just find that in Maharaji and in Elan Vital and in Premies there is simply far too much latitude with the TRUTH.

You have people like "catweasel" saying from one side of his mouth that Maharaji is the closest thing to God walking the planet and out of the other side "I never ever thought Maharaji was God."  Where does it stop?  And "it" is all the lying that has been part and parcel of Divine Light Mission/DUO/Elan Vital/TPRF and, really, Maharaji from the beginning to the present.

And what happens when you become an ex-premie is that you allow the doubt maker to come in and you take back your mind and you start to examine the misinformation and really the undercurrent of discomfort that has been there all along.  Sure, of course, there were huge moments of deep experience.  But, it was always passing and never permanent.  And, in fact, the "experience" even comes with a hangover in my experience where I simply felt disoriented.  And I'm talking darshan and seeing Maharaji as much, if not more, than meditation.

I think Maharaji is dishonest and very manipulative when he speaks.  I also think from seeing him recently that he's quite boring.  He thinks he's absolutely brilliant and amazing, but it's purely pedestrian and mundane.  But, as long as you're a dues paying premie it's golden prashad.

Finally, and we are at odds and will most likely remain so, to awaken and see that one has been misled is an absolutely amazing experience.

God is a concept,

By which we can measure,

Our pain,

I'll say it again,

God is a concept,

By which we can measure,

Our pain,

I don't believe in magic,

I don't believe in I-ching,

I don't believe in bible,

I don't believe in tarot,

I don't believe in Hitler,

I don't believe in Jesus,

I don't believe in Kennedy,

I don't believe in Buddha,

I don't believe in mantra,

I don't believe in Gita,

I don't believe in yoga,

I don't believe in kings,

I don't believe in Elvis,

I don't believe in Zimmerman,

I don't believe in Beatles,

I just believe in me,

Yoko and me,

And that's reality.

The dream is over,

What can I say?

The dream is over,

Yesterday,

I was dreamweaver,

But now I'm reborn,

I was the walrus,

But now I'm John,

And so dear friends,

You just have to carry on,

The dream is over.

P.S.