A little story about (telling) the truth
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Posted by:
Bunny ®

12/15/2005, 08:49:00
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It was the autumn of 97 when a premie couple told me that they had seen a website saying the most awful things about Maharaji.  It had been announced at a local program together with a health warning to stay away from it, but - like a few others - they sneaked a peek at it.  My immediate reaction to them was that any old lies could be published on the internet: Maharaji was in a similar position to the Royal family -the tabloids print all sorts of rubbish about them too and like them, he couldn’t answer back.  I can't believe I said that now, but at the time I really believed it. 

Because of service I had done, I knew things about Maharaji that the average premie didn't, including his drinking and mistress.  But I hadn't told a soul - my loyalty to the Lord was absolute; after all, he ‘operated at a different level’ to the rest of us.

The couple took me at my word and never read the site again, remaining practicing premies.  They moved out of the area shortly afterwards and we lost touch.

I didn't look at the forum until nearly six months later.  I wasn't going to sully my mind with such garbage!  Then late one night, either boredom or curiosity got the better of me and I found forum 3(?) through a google search. 

I was totally shocked.  I couldn't believe the anger towards Maharaji.  Things were rather raw on those early sites to say the least.  I read things I knew to be true and then I read things that were inaccurate. I started copying the email addresses of all the misguided posters so I would be able to contact them and put them right! 

Then I started downloading all of the archives.  The next few days were among the most traumatic of my life.  I read and read - often around the clock.  I was a nervous wreck.  I started reading things that shook my world; the world I had built for the previous 25 years - my entire adult life.  I read things by people I had known and knew were to be trusted that started to severely challenge the gopi-like devotion I had for the 'Living Lord'. 

I felt very alone - there was no-one I felt I really could talk to - the one person I did talk to thought I'd gone nuts and hoped it was just a phase.  I was too afraid to post in case I got ‘flamed’.  I had to read on because I had to know the truth.   After all, it was as a 'seeker of truth' that I arrived at the Lotus Feet in the first place.

I carried on reading over the next few months.  I still went to see Maharaji, hoping beyond hope that some of the things I had been reading were mistaken or could be resolved.  At one premie-only event I sat just a few yards from Maharaji.  It was bizarre.

Then Mike Dettmers posted his account of the premie women that he had procured for Maharaji's sexual use and then cast aside. I knew Mike – I knew he was trustworthy and furthermore, apart from his conscience, had far more to lose than to gain from making this information public.   And as a virtual ‘pimp’ he hardly came off well himself in the sordid event’s he related.

As far as I was concerned, the mistress or affairs were one thing – this was totally different territory.  This was a total and absolutely cruel abuse of power.  There was no humanity in this, let alone any love. I knew the women concerned would have been completely devastated.  That was my final drip.  Maharaji had gone beyond the pale: he could not be the Lord Incarnate and even if he was I could follow him no longer.   I had lost my pivotal reference point for life, the universe and everything.

That was over seven years ago and a lot’s happened since then.  My life has transformed and expanded.  I have found that whatever joy or peace that I used to experience and attribute to knowledge is still mine and always was.  Best of all, I am my own authority now.

One thing would still irk me: I had totally lost touch with the friends who had first directed me to the forum that had led to my freedom. Quite apart form being fond of them, I really felt I owed them a big thank-you and I also owed them the truth.  Then a couple of months ago to my complete delight, they got in touch.  They had emigrated and were coming over on a trip to the UK and managed to find my number again.  I invited them to lunch.

We had a very enjoyable and interesting few hours, reminiscing and catching up.  We talked about many things - it became very clear that they were still practicing premies – especially one of them.   I still hadn’t told them and I couldn’t put it off any longer.  The visit was about to get more interesting.  I knew what I had to say and broke the news as gently as I could.  One was particularly shocked.  They had been premies for 12 years and they had never read any of the forums since I warned them off over seven years ago.  I watched them exit that afternoon and now they are premies no longer.  They have their power and their lives back.

Of course their transition has included denial, anger, guilt, blame and the rest of it – some of it that very afternoon and more since.  But we are in touch regularly and I am happy to report that they are both fine and having a great life in their new country.   In telling them, for me on one level it felt like a conversation was being continued and on another that a cycle was being completed.

“If you don’t like it, walk” I remember Maharaji expressing this and similar sentiments at a number of events.  For some of us, it’s not as simple as that.  Not after a lifetime of energy spent introducing others to give their power and wealth away to Maharaji and making him rich off the proceeds.  Knowledge wasn’t a hobby that I could just give up but my whole raison d'être’.  So supporting forums like this to ensure that the information is available is the least I can do. I don’t mind if folks choose to follow Maharaji as long as they make that decision in full knowledge of the facts about him.

Thank you to everyone that supports (and posts in) the various websites that promote the truth about Maharaji.   The truth has to be told.  In doing so, you have made and are still making, a tremendous difference to me and hundreds of others.

Bunny

 

 

 







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Rawat is a Santa Claus wannabe.
Re: A little story about (telling) the truth -- Bunny Top of thread Archive
Posted by:
Will ®

12/15/2005, 11:11:23
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Bunny, thanks so much for writing your story. 

Today, I am seeing Prem Rawat as a Santa Claus wannabe, and premies as people who are all excited about his bag of toys.

People involved with Knowledge are good people, to a great extent.  They deserve honesty.  But if they have lost their regard for the actual truth, then they deserve Rawat and they will get exactly what they are looking for - an idealistic fantasy.  It is so hard for me to understand current practicing premies.  I would like to read their new chatline, but I don't think they would allow me to register and read there.  What can they be thinking!?

I certainly applaud those premies whose regard for the truth outweighs their regard for Prem Rawat and their concepts about him.  I applaud all those who see through the shameless hype of PR's media releases, and all the rest of the myth.

As for Rawat, he is equally difficult to understand. It seems to me that Rawat is entirely motivated by his own desire to be a guru, and I don't think he has any clue what effect his teaching is really having on people.  Surely he must know how many people have rejected him and his teaching.  How he still gets up there and sets himself up as a Master is so crazy, no less crazy than somebody believing themselves to be Santa Claus.

The main problem with Rawat is that his teaching is fundamentally false - a person's inner peace does NOT depend on becoming a following of Prem Rawat and practicing those four techniques.   Rawat's method for peace is laughable, and utterly hopeless.  His movement will never, ever amount to anything but an obscure cult.  Because the truth of the matter is that inner peace is entirely independent of Prem Rawat, and/or any other supposed "master," and also entirely independent of those four meditation techniques.

I imagine that the Keys are already failing in the United States and elsewhere.  How much longer this Perfect Master charade is going to continue is anybody's guess, but I say it has gone on way too long already.  If Rawat wants to be a "spokesperson for peace," then there is nothing wrong with that.  But he will never become the "world renowned spokesperson for peace" as his current public-relations campaign trys to paint him.  Because he is just a Santa Claus wannabe with a bag of toys that only a fool would want.







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Prem Rawat's version of "A Christmas Carol"
Re: Rawat is a Santa Claus wannabe. -- Will Top of thread Archive
Posted by:
Neville B ®

12/15/2005, 14:02:08
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Woken by the ghost of his father, he is taken to see the sheer misery his lies have created.

Of course, it makes no difference whatsoever.

Neville B







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Re: Rawat is a Santa Claus wannabe.
Re: Rawat is a Santa Claus wannabe. -- Will Top of thread Archive
Posted by:
The Falcon ®

12/16/2005, 03:31:30
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he is having to re-jig The Keys because he forgot to tell the viewer to practice K once they have it - some guru!!!






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re-jigging "The Keys" - can you divulge a bit more, Falcon? (nt)
Re: Re: Rawat is a Santa Claus wannabe. -- The Falcon Top of thread Archive
Posted by:
cq ®

12/16/2005, 15:43:51
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Great post, Bunny!
Re: A little story about (telling) the truth -- Bunny Top of thread Archive
Posted by:
JHB ®

12/15/2005, 11:43:57
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Definitely best of forum so far!

Although I believed in Rawat for 25 years, I now realise that very little of my emotional life was invested in him in the later years, so although reading EPO and the forum archives (I also spent several weeks doing this) was a big jolt to my mind, I had the emotional resources to get through pretty much unscathed. I think previous difficult times unrelated to Rawat or premies in the early 90s also helped prepare me. And most importantly, the fact that I had a good social life and interests outside work and premies meant that no adjustment regarding friends and day to day life was necessary.

For you and others with similar time as a premie, who had far more of their day to day life invested in being a premie, and having a social life with other premies, it must have been so much harder, and you have my sympathies. I know you have done this, but from my experience, anyone leaving after so long, should concentrate on building a life away from premies (and for some, in my opinion, away from ex-premies!). When premies and EV say that ex-premies should move on, in a way they are right (and the facts show that the vast, vast majority have moved on). Sure we have something very important in common, and I value the friends I've made amongst ex-premies, but there's a big world out there, and our healing requires that we find our place in it.

John.





Modified by JHB at Thu, Dec 15, 2005, 12:25:30

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The company you keep
Re: Great post, Bunny! -- JHB Top of thread Archive
Posted by:
Bunny ®

12/17/2005, 12:29:25
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Thanks John!

Remember all of that satsang about the company you keep - company of truth and all that?  It went nicely along with 'never delay in attending satsang' as a method of keeping premies brainwashed and away from corrupting influences.

I always did have friends outside the cult but regretfully, some friendships were starved of nourishment because so much of my time and energy was given to knowledge.  And then there was always that underlining feeling that non-premies were 'premies in waiting' - somehow not quite whole as human beings without the divine grace of Maharaji's gift.  How arrogant and disrespectful is that?  There was always that underlying feeling that I should be telling them about it - enough to undermine any relationship.  Sometimes I did and hooked them into the cult - whilst a few ran for the hills! 

It is very hard for a practicing premie to have genuine friendships let alone a functional relationship.  I wonder if it's even possible considering that their ultimate loyalty will always be to Maharaji.  The 'relationship' they put most love and energy into isn't even real.  Exiting from the cult reveals a lot about the strength of friendships with other premies.  I do still have some but am very aware of what's 'off-limits'  (I live in hope! ).

Now the overwhelming majority of my friends are not and never have been premies.  I agree that any exiting premies really do need to get out more!   It's essential to shift your reference point away from the cult and find your place in the big wide world which, for the most part, has never heard of the LOTU. 

At the same time,  I too, really value the ex-premie friends I have and have made.  It has been a very unusual life journey into, through and out of the cult and it's good to be able to really share the perspective that it gives.  And very important - to be able to laugh about it all too!

Bunny 







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Re: The company you keep
Re: The company you keep -- Bunny Top of thread Archive
Posted by:
quirky ®

12/19/2005, 15:33:36
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Hi Bunny,
Yes, the company of ex-P's has also been very valuable to me. Having the opportunity to process out loud with a 'real' person has been invaluable. Especially this week. I am back in the town where I spent most my years as a premie and will be seeing a good friend tomorrow who does not know I exited. We shall see how that pans out. Friday I get to spend with an ex-P I reconnected with on forum 8 and have not seen in person since 'back in the days" we both were slaves to the master... : )
wish me luck!!






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Great post, Bunny. Thanks.
Re: A little story about (telling) the truth -- Bunny Top of thread Archive
Posted by:
Joe ®

12/15/2005, 12:13:22
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Re: A little story about (telling) the truth
Re: A little story about (telling) the truth -- Bunny Top of thread Archive
Posted by:
Premie_spouse ®

12/15/2005, 12:27:00
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Thanks, Bunny.  It was very helpful to me to read your post.  






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Re: A little story about (telling) the truth
Re: A little story about (telling) the truth -- Bunny Top of thread Archive
Posted by:
imagine1 ®

12/15/2005, 15:42:52
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Thanks for sharing that, Bunny!  And so extensively, too.  I could relate to the shock of realising that the center of your known world was knocked out by the revelations on epo because I felt the same--and it's taking time to find a new center, for sure.  But the whole experience, before, during, and after has inched me closer to the true center of my world--which after all has to be my own sense of what's true!  It's a life-lesson for me--NOT to rely on someone else to tell me what's true!  Not that I can't glean bits and pieces of helpful information out there, or connect with other people in the heart and for the moment.  It's the construction of idols that brought me low.  Interesting that there's even something in the Bible about that too!  (Moses, etc). But I'm very wary of anything to do with religions and spiritual "paths" these days.  I think the Native Americans came the closest to having it right--they lived in awe of life and nature every day.  It wasn't separate from who they were!

Glad to hear you are getting on with your life and are in a much stronger place now!

Best,

Shelagh







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I relate to that
Re: Re: A little story about (telling) the truth -- imagine1 Top of thread Archive
Posted by:
Bunny ®

12/17/2005, 12:48:52
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"I think the Native Americans came the closest to having it right--they lived in awe of life and nature every day.  It wasn't separate from who they were!"

I think I must be a pagan at heart.  Nature is the true expression of divinity, if one exists at all.  There is nothing more beautiful, more inspiring or more awesome than life and nature.  If I don't honour that then how can I even begin to aspire to anything remotely 'spiritual'.

There is such a disconnect between the current premie lifestyle and nature.  After all, nothing else is real apart from Knowledge - as I distinctly remember Maharaji saying: 

"Knowledge is the only thing happening"

Yea, right!

Regards,

Bunny

P.S. Speaking of nature - I shudder to think what my 'carbon footprint' was when I was racing around the world from program to program!







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Re: A little story about (telling) the truth
Re: A little story about (telling) the truth -- Bunny Top of thread Archive
Posted by:
wolfie ®

12/16/2005, 03:05:15
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Hi Bunny,

thanks very much for your story. As a premie so many times I tried to check what my inner experience really is. My honest result always was, that cause of rembering "holy name" that is not different for me to mindfull breathing, I felt in touch with myself. So far my inner experience was okay and helped me to be aware of my own status. But I was in a conflict cause the way M talked about that experience. Even after more than 25 practicing knowledge my experience did not come close to what he was talkíng about.

One day I still remember, when M again was praising what that knowledge had brougth for him, I thougt by myself: "okay maybe he is praising the effects that knowledge had for him, a very luxury lifestile, thousands of willing servants and so on" This I could't get out of my mind, especially when he talks in his sometimes too much enthusiatic way about this wonderful experience, so that I started feel nearly miserable. 

Okay what I wanted to say is, that I have learnt as a premie to stay in touch with myself. The reason that I sat for more than a "million" hours on the floor trying to get something out of meditation ( or practicing the technics) had some postiv effect I don't want miss for me personally. Maybe there was a lot of wasted time too and the disillusion about M was and still is something that has to be digested. But I'm glad that I've learnt a great lesson and not stuck in desperation about it. I feel more stabel since I left M and I appreciate my decision to be free from him. Funny how things changes in the opposite. Sometimes the things you expect help from are the things that bring you only more confusion and M brings confusion but a lot of people enjoy it cause it has the same effect as a drug.

We've done it well......we are gone away....wolfie







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Re: A little story about (telling) the truth
Re: Re: A little story about (telling) the truth -- wolfie Top of thread Archive
Posted by:
toby ®

12/16/2005, 11:19:19
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could you please read your private messages?

toby






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Re: A little story about (telling) the truth
Re: Re: A little story about (telling) the truth -- toby Top of thread Archive
Posted by:
wolfie ®

12/19/2005, 04:10:18
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Hi,

I haven't got any.....wolfie







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That's a beautiful post,Bunny........
Re: A little story about (telling) the truth -- Bunny Top of thread Archive
Posted by:
Lexy ®

12/16/2005, 06:51:46
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....and I can entirely relate. xx.






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thank you Bunny
Re: A little story about (telling) the truth -- Bunny Top of thread Archive
Posted by:
milarepa ®

12/16/2005, 14:18:36
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