"I think if I was still a premie, and had somehow rationalised away the info on the internet, I would feel such relief and joy at seeing Rawat. I reckon for premies who aren't wavering, seeing Rawat is getting better and better, although being away from him will be more painful. "

I'm not quite sure what you mean by that , John ?? I'm a newly exed premie . Seeing Rawat never got better and better.It stayed predictably similar or it was something of a disappointment .

I feel relief and joy at not having had to turn my life upside down and bankrupt myself trying to get to see Rawat at yet another Venue in yet another city that I won't have time to see.

 Relief and joy at not having to answer the questions of friends and colleagues when I return ( Did you have a good time? What did you do / see ?...My reply as brief and unspecific as pos.).

Relief and joy at not having to listen to those pathetic jokes.

Relief and joy at not having to worry about whether I'm having an "experience" or not.

Relief and joy at not having to feel so alone amongst such a huge crowd.

Relief and joy at not using up my paid holiday time-off from work.

Relief and joy at not having to find someone to feed my cat.

and finally Relief and joy at not having to feel guilty because I didn't / couldn't go.