Hi Susan,

I've been trying not to stick my nose in where it doesn't belong...but I can't help myself, I keep thinking about you so I'm gonna go ahead and butt in a bit...

In my opinion, I think you were being way too hard on yourself.  I recognize it well, I do it all the time too.  I appreciated your first post, didn't think it was harsh or rude or anything other than expressing your own personal ideas...which by the way I deeply valued as a necessary glimpse into the other side of fondness.  The reality that both pleasure and pain were co existing is something we shouldn't lose sight of.

And then I saw your apology, and thought huh...wonder what she's feeling bad about...

And though I admired your humility and willingness to re think yourself...I have to do that all the time...I found nothing worthy of apologizing for when I re read the first one, and decided I was right.  You are too hard on yourself dear Susan.  You were very clear in saying it was just your addition to the conversation and not meant to rebuke the other opinions.  And I thought it a good reality check...I like to read about the good times too, but we can never forget how fucked up it was for so many.

And what a conversation that has been sparked

Also, I totally got what you were saying about Art and who made it...I've had that same experience, trying to wrap my head around loving a piece while struggling to remove any hurtful stuff I know about the artist...we are so complex aren't we!  And I as I thought more about it, I noticed something else...the examples you used had everything to do with your specific journey (and I realize that they were just examples...but interesting), and the artists I sometimes struggle with the most, have that same quality, close to the heart...hard for me to appreciate, because of their suicides.  Robin Williams for example...I can barely look at him let alone watch anything he's done or any tributes to him...even though he so deserves to be celebrated, I find I just can't without his suicide constantly lingering around...we all know sad people make good art..but when evil people try to make art...yeah, hard to enjoy it.

That's all...just wanted to support you a bit...be well and thanks for your post!

Love, Genny