Thanks philareflection. Glad you liked my post and were kind enough to say so. You too Cynthia!
I don't like to play the victim card and never go around feeling sorry for myself. Like most of us, I am a good person; kind, thoughtful, considerate, empathetic, fair, honest, trusting, etc ....... Plus I've been a hard worker, a team player, very resourceful, and all about doing good things for others and the rest of the world.
(Wow jasper; that sure is grandiose and pretty self promoting! Not really. Please read on.)
I'm not saying any of that to gloat about myself. I'm saying it because that is exactly the kind of person that attracts Narcissists. They seek out people of good will and decent character. Why? Because a true narcissist/con artist knows how to penetrate our relatively weak defense mechanisms and lie about themselves while hiding their evil intentions. Good people make easier targets. Narcissists want to control us for their own purposes, whatever that may be. We are seen as nothing more than objects to be used and then cast aside when no longer of any benefit.
I say "we" because my guess is that most of us, including those still in the cult, probably display many of these same "good person" character traits. And we have all been victims of a Narcissist. The folks who I've met that post here have been some of the most caring and supportive people I've ever encountered. The couple of active premies I'm still in touch with are wonderful too, and incredibly kind and thoughtful.
I've thought a lot about this. Studied it. In hindsight, I've attracted several Narcissists through various other relationships in my life. It has really helped me to understand as much as I can about these types of people and then run like hell if I meet one. In fact, I noticed that as I've become more aware of the threat posed by a Narcissist, they seem to know I'm on to them and leave me alone.
Now, I'm suspicious of anyone who is too nice, too complimentary, promises too much, too anything. Its not normal and in many cases, its an artificial smokescreen intentionally manufactured to provide temporary cover for the Narcissist. And once we drop our guard, they are ready to pounce and set their hooks. From then on, good luck getting out of it in one piece! Does any of this make sense? Because for me once I understood it, a lot of seemingly disconnected experiences and pieces started to fall into place.
