When I first became a premie it was after being taken away from London to a remote farmhouse in the countryside, under false pretences. (on many levels )
The world of Maharaj Ji and Knowledge was NEVER a blissful wonderland for me but a ghastly place of torment. I had left everything safe and familiar behind and was under the tyranny of a fundamentalist premie who , once I was miles from anything or anyone that I knew, proceeded to insist I stay at that place ( through fear...Guru Maharaj Ji wants you to be here....) and by mocking me for not being steadfast enough. There was a whole brow beaten group of us working in slave labour and obeying all kinds of radical rules. I was in a constant and sometimes agonising state of turmoil that sounds very like the state Manincar found himself in AFTER he was deprogrammed. It makes me feel that, because I had fallen among strict and radical premies living in weird , cold and hungry circumstances, it was the equivalent of being deprogrammed overnight from my relatively comfy and "normal" pre-premie existence. So kind of the opposite of Manincar but a similar feeling.
While I was living at the farm, a group of my previous friends came to kidnap and rescue me. These had been my best friends but I had been brainwashed to believe that they weren't really my friends. I refused to go with them because I would have been ( in my addled brain) "turning my back on the Lord "........honestly....what a crock ! And what lovely friends to have tried to save me
I escaped from THAT PLACE after a few months but it was another 30 years before I extricated myself from the cult altogether , thanks to this forum and stalwarts like Cynthia, John and Jim ( and all you others...much appreciated )
Thankyou Manincar for your sincere, heartfelt post. Certainly food for thought.
Modified by lexy at Sat, Nov 19, 2016, 07:32:20