I agree with um was it manincar who said he liked reading posts like yours. 

And yes you're right "pitfalls of the romantic/spiritual imagination" is the only phrase that made me feel downcast.  That's because it was my whole point!  Don't blame the victim.  It's like blaming the lion for the pit he fell into - He didn't dig it, the hunter did.

But I thoroughly endorse and cheer up all over again at the recognition that you have coupled romance and spirituality.

Alain Botton's whole schtick is prodding at the lion caught in the pit.

The girl who is ready to believe any outlandish reason why the guy hasn't called her, rather than the obvious one of He's Just Not That Into You - my first thought is well that's pretty normal, and maybe she was misled, maybe he wanted her to believe he was interested in her rather than acknowledge he just wasn't.  

so no, I'm not going to watch the video - the advance publicity for the book has saved me from having that experience.